Flirting Body Language 101

Beside our vocal way of communicating, body language is our second vital means of communication. However, it acts more on a subconscious level than speaking does. This is a fact that many self-proclaimed mind-readers use to their advantage. As an average person, it’s not possible to not communicate with your body. Accordingly, our brain processes and interprets the body language of other people without us actively knowing it. This is why it’s a great advantage to have a basic knowledge of body language to not only understand your date, but to be able to react better with your own body language.

Welcoming Gestures

"Your gestures will tell her your intensions"

“Your gestures will tell her your intensions”

These gestures can not only be to your advantage when you see and understand them. You can also deliberately use them yourself to show the woman you’re approaching your intentions. Welcoming and open gestures are meant to invite conversation and have varying levels, depending on whom you’re with. In the case of flirting with a woman, good signs are her angling her body toward you, along with her arms and hands not crossing in front of it. This is a relaxed and open pose. Of course it’s possible that other factors can make her cross her arms – especially if it’s cold, though usually, she’ll lift her shoulders and hunch together to conserve warmth in this case. Naturally, eye contact and smiles are the most telling of welcoming and flirting gestures.

Gestures of Similarity

If you’ve ever stood in an elevator with others and yawned, you’ll have noticed that it doesn’t take too long for someone else to do the same. We often subconsciously imitate each other without really knowing why. Although group yawning is less a sign for dating compatibility, many other imitated gestures are, simply because it gives off the feeling of being similar people. It’s a subtle way of saying that you both synchronize well. This is practically the essence of flirting – seeing how well you suit each other. So when she takes a drink, wait a few seconds and then do the same. It’s vital to wait a bit, as always doing it in the same instance is more apparent and will look slightly creepy to her.


"Stay cautious while touching her - It should look innocent"

“Stay cautious while touching her – It should look innocent”

Touching doesn’t always have to be you touching her and vice versa. While men get their intentions across by casually touching non-incriminating areas like a woman’s arm and back, women do it more by touching themselves. Gestures like touching her own shoulder, tossing or combing back her hair are supposed to draw your attention and attraction. She’ll also comfortably play with the rim of her glass or items that are close by without fiddling with them. Fiddling is a nervous gesture. Of course, this all doesn’t mean that she won’t touch you at all. Just like you she’ll start with innocent areas and with more confidence move closer to more intimate touches.

Even though the decision for compatibility and a second date depends on body language and tone of voice, remember not to focus completely on these two things. Doing so will make you inadvertently stare at her, watching every single movement and when she notices (and she will), she’ll get uncomfortable. Simply take note of changes you notice and act on them.

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